It's a Fearful Thing -
This Thing Called Faith
2 Therefore, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed me, not only in my presence, but much more now in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; 13 for it is God who is at work in you, enabling you both to will and to work for his good pleasure. 14 Do all things without murmuring and arguing, 15 so that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, in which you shine like stars in the world. 16 It is by your holding fast to the word of life that I can boast on the day of Christ that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. 17 But even if I am being poured out as a libation over the sacrifice and the offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you— 18 and in the same way you also must be glad and rejoice with me.
Philippians 2:12-18
I believe I can identify with Paul, here in his letter to the congregation at Philippi ; especially the fear and trembling part. I sense that when anyone really set outs on a truly spiritual pilgrimage, that it can become not only a true source of security and hope for us, but can also become a confusing and sometimes harrowing experience. To journey on a spiritual pathway – that is in an intimate, ever evolving relationship with our still-Creating God – is to step out in a manner of blind trust in our Lord’s promised presence and guidance. Certainly there are guideposts along the roadway; our sacred scriptures, the preaching of the wise masters, and maybe even the personal leadership of a trusted mentor. But these tools that can help steer us down the proper course are not the relationship itself. They are very important, but, in and of themselves, they do not craft the closeness of the bond with God. Only our daily walk with the Creator can do that. Only our personal meeting with our God, regardless of how distant we may feel at the moment that God is from us, as we come face-to-face with all the worldly odds against us, can we grow to trust in the One who promises Life.
I personally have found, at least for me, that my drawing ever closer to my God has helped calm the many fears that I have once, or maybe even still to some degree, hold. But, I am also fully aware that I carry within me some of those human doubts and anxiety over my very present personal state of affairs; the very stuff that we all feel deep down within us. The emotions we connect with all that, and the oftentimes apprehensiveness over a future that we cannot touch or see clearly, is all still there. And so I can connect with these words of Paul’s when he states, “ … work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; 13 for it is God who is at work in you, enabling you both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” Our walk with God does not guarantee a pleasurable future, nor riches, nor a life free of the pains that life often presses upon us, especially if we are allowing God to accomplish the increase of God’s Kingdom through us as partners on the journey we take together. Our future – our spirituality – our ever deepening relationship with our Lord – or in the words of Paul, our working out our own salvation hand-in-hand with God, will have its downright terrifying moments. But, it is this intimate journey of the soul – and only this journey – that leads to the life for which we all yearn.
Fear and trembling are part and parcel to our cherished relationship with God. Its okay to experience the doubts and confusion which life brings our way. But as we do, let us trust more completely in the One who has faced this all before, and confidently place our very being into God’s care – now and forever.
When the daily struggles of life get too difficult to bear, O Lord, and the fears rear up within, touch my spirit and remind me that you are right here with me. When doubts begin to cloud my mind – and my faith – remind me of the doubts of the prophets before me, who oftentimes stood trembling before the world’s powers to boldly speak your word. And when I feel abandoned – which brings the greatest fear of all – speak to me of Gethsemane , and of your interminable power over death of all kinds. Lift me up, Lord, as we journey together each day.
Amen.
Rev. Michael Kirchhoff
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